Note 2 Self:
Always bring a fly swatter to church. While sitting in church on Sunday, my husband and I couldn’t help but stare at the big, shiny, bald head that was blocking our view from the pastor. A very large man sat down right in front of us and I’m pretty sure he had just polished his head. That thing was reflecting light from all sides. It was so glossy that it was hard to control myself…I wanted so badly to touch it. We were quietly discussing our urges to reach out and rub it when all of a sudden…a fly landed right on Mr. Clean’s head. (Mr. Clean! Mr. Cleeeeeeeeaaan!) My husband and I looked at each other with our eyes as big as saucers. We had to bite our lips to stop ourselves from laughing. The fly must have liked his new landing pad because he decided to stay a while. That little guy ventured from side to side and from top to bottom. How did the big bald man not feel this? My head was itching just watching it. The longer the fly stayed, the harder it was not to laugh. Finally, with one foul swoop the bald man’s hand smacked down on the fly’s new home. Poor little guy went flying off into the world while my husband and I went back to biting our lips.
What Chaps My Cheeks:
It really chaps my cheeks when people don’t properly supervise their children. The entrance of my neighborhood is a bus stop for kids going to school. There is a mom who parks her mini van right in the middle of the street and lets her 3 wild animals (A.K.A. her kids) get out of the van and play tag. They do this every morning and every morning I not only have to drive ‘around’ her mini van (because pulling off to the side would be too hard) but I also have to dodge their backpacks that are in the middle of the road and avoid running her children over. I drive past VERY slowly as to not run a precious little toe over, and what do you think the precious little munchkins do? Give up? Ok, I’ll tell you. They run up to my car and look in the window! I wish I was kidding, but I’m not. Minivan mom just sits there. Doesn’t even say a word. Not only should she say something about how rude it is to look in someone else’s car…while they are in it…and driving…but what about their safety? Is she hoping that one of them gets run over? Because at this rate, the odds are very high. It takes everything in me not to lay on the horn and scare the living day lights out of them. “Get out of my way before my bumper meets your face!” I’d yell at them and then I’d stick my tongue out in a grade school sort of way. Yeah, that would teach them! Minivan mom better look out. Road rage Nellie over here has had about enough.
You Know You’re a Mom When…
You wake up to the sound of your child barking like a dog on the baby monitor. I think someone is excited about her newly learned animal sounds.
Jack: “Momma, Jesus cries when you don’t let me watch cartoons.”
Recipe: Pumpkin Rice Krispies Treats
- 3 tablespoons butter or margarine
- 1 package (10 oz., about 40) regular marshmallows
- - OR -
- 4 cups miniature marshmallows
- Food coloring (orange)
- 6 cups Kellogg’s® Rice Krispies® cereal
- 12 bite-size candies (such as peanut butter cups, chocolate-covered nougat bars or large gum drops)
- Canned frosting (green)
- 12 small green gum drops